Mind the gap

Warm air billows up my legs.
If I close my eyes I won’t see Eva Herzigová’s
HELLO BOYS
HELLO BOYS
HELLO BOYS
cleavage
as I slide down the escalator.

My own push-up bra is wonder-less.
It performs no miracles
cutting into ribs, hiding spaces –
the places where fat should be.

All morning my reflection seeks me out;
shop-fronts, car windows, the airless black
of this underground train window.
I check I haven’t grown in the time
between leaving home and arriving –
that my stomach is still flat.
A group of girls get on at Embankment
spilling out of tops – girls who I know

will finish everything on their plates.
The next station will be Piccadilly Circus.
I drift light headed to doors, the train
whooshing into light, a fist of oats in a belly
eaten too many long forgotten hours ago.
I could slip down    so easily     wisp of a girl.
Mind the gap.

 

 

Eleanor Punter has recently written a pamphlet exploring the complex relationship women have with their bodies including her own experience of anorexia. She has been short-listed in various competitions and won third prize in the 2019 Binsted competition.