Teeth like Freddie
They were the talk of the town. If not the town, then school at least. Everyone at school knew Stephen Bentley had teeth like Freddie. The most sought-after gnashers in stardom. He even looked a bit like Freddie too, with his short black hair and ghost of a moustache.
We even think Miss Perkins had a crush on him. Of course she couldn’t actually come out and say it but there was definitely something in those looks of hers. The way she picked him to stay behind for a few minutes and help her tidy the classroom ready for the start of next lesson, which basically meant a few more minutes gazing at Freddie Mercury Jr. She would have loved that.
Stephen though, did not.
He hated his slightly goofy teeth, the way his mouth looked like a Venus fly trap when it was closed as though his teeth yearned to escape. He hated the way they drew unwanted attention and prompted jibes whenever he entered a room – be it classroom, dinner hall or the bogs. But most of all, he hated when Peter Grove and the rest of his clan all burst into song, reeling off Another One Bites the Dust, The Show Must Go On and, of course, Bohemian Rhapsody like they were letters of the alphabet. He must have cursed them every day; the look in his eyes resembled jagged shards of glass – intended to wound.
So when we discovered him in Geography wearing a brace, we were too shocked to speak.
No, it can’t be. Steve can’t be wearing a…can he? God, he is…
Even I had to blink several times and pinch myself to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. Stephen Bentley was wearing a brace.
‘What’s he wearing that for?’ said Peter.
‘Dunno. Must be the new look.’
‘But look at it. It’s all metal and…horrible. Yuck!’
I said, ‘He’s obviously wearing it to correct his teeth. To straighten them and make him look less…goofy.’
I really wanted to use another word but nothing sprang to mind. The other guys just looked at each other, then burst out laughing.
Although their laughter didn’t last long.
Within three months, Stephen Bentley looked considerably less goofy; his mouth now resembled a small closed tulip. Even Miss Perkins noticed the difference. She stopped singling him out. She stopped trying to catch his eye in class. She stopped asking him to stay behind.
Stephen was glad. Now he could spend his full attention on the texts she gave us to read in class instead of timing his moments to look up.
I, for one, was slightly pissed off with him; he no longer had the adoration of Miss Perkins, and to tell you the truth that was no mean feat – she was quite the catch. All I had to do now was get her to notice me.
After six months had passed, there were no visible signs that he ever had teeth like the legendary Freddie Mercury. This erased any respect I secretly held for him. Peter & Co. stopped singing the hits and no longer made a crack about his teeth. Stephen Bentley was now a regular teenager with no distinguishing feature. Stephen Bentley was actually quite boring.
Eight months after he had the brace fitted, Stephen Bentley had it removed. And he looked like a completely different guy. He grew his hair long, shaved off the ghost moustache and flashed us the least-goofiest grin ever.
I felt myself, Peter, and all his friends shrink inside our school uniform. Now we were the pathetic ones.
A few weeks later the school seemed different without his trademark teeth. Each lesson was an even longer, more painful experience, with students resorting to throwing paper aeroplanes to make the time pass, though it wasn’t the same. It was never the same again.
I missed the jokes, the greatest hits, the camaraderie. Peter & Co. did too.
My dentist was surprised to see me after an eighteen month absence, and was even more surprised when he heard my request.
‘I don’t know if I can make you look like Freddie but I can certainly try to get you his teeth.’
And so the treatment began.
Already I can hear Peter & Co. singing the hits, their voices proud and full of contentment. I can also see the glad eyes of Miss Perkins looking straight at me.
Lauren Bell lives in Birmingham and is often drunk on inspiration. Her work has been published by Word Bohemia, Synaesthesia Magazine, Bare Fiction, The Casket of Fictional Delights and Storgy Magazine where she is a contributing writer