Earlier this week there was a documentary shown on UK TV about King Edward VII. By coincidence, regular IS&T contributor Geoff Stevens has submitted a poem inspired by one King Edward's more infamous social put-downs – when he saw Lord Harris in a brown bowler hat and tweeds in the Royal Enclosure at
Ascot, the King quipped “Morning Harris, going ratting?”
GOING RATTING HARRIS?
According to King Edward
it’s turning up
for the Royal Enclosure
wearing tweeds.
These days, it’s asking for egg & chips
in The Chinese.
It’s not eating pizza
or wearing jeans.
It’s going to Margate
for your holidays.
It’s not wearing a red nose
or giving to Comic Relief.
It’s being quiet in libraries
or asking for a beer
at a book launching.
It’s not buying The Guardian.
It’s owning an iPod
or using your laptop on a train.
It’s calling a railway station
a railway station.
It’s not shaving off body hair
or having a tattoo
It’s not liking hip-hop
or spinning on your head.
It’s not having a loyalty card.
It’s paying cash
It’s being quick.
It’s singing Rule Britannia in schools.
It’s having common sense
instead of being politically correct.
It’s greater than winning the lottery
or being voted in as a MP.
It’s someone asking
“Going ratting, Harris?”
it’s a badge of honour
it’s better than a MBE.
* Geoff
Stevens is a regular IS&T contributor, who as well as being a painter and poet, has run the Purple Patch magazines for may year. Last year he was awarded The Ted Slade Award for
Services to Poetry.