Counting Down
10
counting ten
the last bus is empty
she wants to stay
at least the lights are friendly
and she can talk to the driver
9
counting nine
a dark street
nothing can frighten her now
she watches the clouds
treads quietly
pinpoints the moon
8
counting eight
again a lost key
he answers the door
hello is awkward
7
counting seven
she hangs her coat on the staircase
both hover
green tea or red wine?
how easy is it to sit in her own sitting room?
6
counting six
who will she phone
texting her children
raking up friends
scripting upbeat
5
counting five
she fills crates
a life’s journey writ in plastic,frames and gloss finish
mustn’t look
ignore the ghosts
a “good morning”..
the postman….dogwalkers…people laughing
laughing.
4
counting four
she marks up property pages
dreams of….of not dreaming
of no more questions
3
counting three
revising versions of self
when is tomorrow?
this is the one time
she must not listen to herself
2
counting two
“why don’t you stand on our own feet…”
her own feet can’t hold all of her
can anyone?
She moves closer to the corners of her home
whispers her blue notes to its walls
gathers each room tenderly in the palm of her hand
where babies,teenagers and her mother slept once
and a suddenly ageing married woman lay awake
wanting more,wanting it all.
counting one
she considers the lives she didn’t lead
loosens her grip…
stop.
Go now.
Annie Pia returned to writing after a 30 year gap a year ago. She has published in Poetry Scotland and Northwords Now Magazine and one of her poems was chosen last year for the Stanza International Festival Masterclass. Annie is an active member of two Edinburgh-based writing groups, she has read at the Edinburgh Fringe and Shore Poets.