Endangered Species
Whatever became of the ‘fancy man’?
The salesmen and under-managers in suits
whose aftershave vied with toothpaste and tobacco,
occasional consorts of women my mother disapproved of,
who called round afternoons to see wives
no better than they ought to be,
those women who dared see-through blouses,
dyed their hair to match a switch
and had babydoll nighties on the line
in the days when avocado was exotic,
sex was like a shunting-yard
and women didn’t come.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
A Dangerous Age
Unlike me, you were always somebody:
somebody’s wife, somebody’s mistress;
the guitarist’s girlfriend.
Expelled from more than one exclusive school,
you never bothered with exams or work,
your life a work-in-progress.
You sent your genes skittering towards tomorrow,
but can’t decide what to do today.
Your body is a fever of hormone-dumping,
fired up on high-octane HRT,
core strengthened only by Pilates.
Every frozen pea you suck: ten calories;
every glass of Chardonnay: three units;
each meal requiring four miles on a treadmill.
You wonder why I don’t just fast like you,
that I can’t be happy, size fourteen and fat.
You live from man to man
and, in between, your life disappears
through the cracks in the pavement:
a little gardening, a game of squash,
a dog that’s never walked.
The landscaper might have loved you,
but you couldn’t tell him from Jack-the-Lad
who fixed the Aga flue – badly.
You ring me Saturday evenings
to complain you’re home alone again,
although your daughter’s just arrived with friends.
That’s when the appointments run out:
the gym, the Botox doctor, two types of laser,
spray tan, massage, day spa, nails and hair.
What are you doing tonight? you ask me.
Writing? You think I definitely can’t be happy.
* Bev Ellis is a refugee from the chalk-face and still jumps every time a bell rings, like a punch-drunk boxer. She writes about fractured lives, borderlines and rudeness, exploring women’s experiences with an unflinching gaze. She has escaped from Lowestoft many times, but is invariably recaptured. She has a degree in English & American Literature from Warwick and taught English in Suffolk for fifteen years.
